Omarosa, Astrosplained

Wow, the greatness of today!  According to April Ryan — by far my favorite reporter of 2017 though many of them have been great — Omarosa threw an actual fit when they fired her.  Oh, the deliciousness of this video.

So in case you don’t believe April, aside from the fact that she’s a fine journalist, the chart I describe below should put all of your concerns to rest, you can believe everything April says.  Angela Rye cracks me up, too.  If I may quickly say, I absolutely LOVE April’s look in this video.  The silk blouse and “Tin Cup” necklace are sublime, and her makeup even matches.  She’s like a glass of champagne.  I wish they didn’t have to put that ugly mic right on her neckline, which I would like to see.

Also the deal with Omarosa not “resigning” until January 20 is some sweetheart thing Trump worked out for her with the Office of Management and Budget.  The thing is, the federal government can fire anyone for the first 365 days, for no reason at all.  If they do, you are “unfit for government service,” it’s a black mark on your record though the dismissal can be, and often is, completely arbitrary.  So if you “resign,” you are technically able to be rehired, though it will never happen.  Of course that makes you also ineligible for unemployment compensation, which you would otherwise be entitled to because you were terminated.  See?  This is why a lot of us even on the left are kind of happy to see the federal government get its comeuppance.  Americans have no idea how ugly our government is.  So bottom line they’re letting her save face, and paying her through the 20th so she can show exactly one year of employment.  It’s Trump’s way of hooking her up with severance.

Anyway, it is a shame Omarosa is so ugly.  Her face is lovely, she’s obviously very bright and capable.  The key word I would use for Omarosa is actually dynamic.  But she’s just an ugly person, mean and unpleasant.  She could’ve been anything, and she went with this.  Why?  Well, gentle reader, the chart below connects all the dots.

Omarosa chart

Once again, thanks to the greatness of, I have a proper time for Omarosa.  Thus I can look at houses and angles, which gives a lot of depth to the reading, especially in this particular chart.

But first things first, the Sun is Aquarius, so this is a Saturn-Uranus chart.  Uranus is the contemporary ruler, however the old timers used Saturn before they discovered Uranus.  So both of those two are automatically lit up.  The contrast between the traditional and modern rulers is also telling:  Saturn is about rules, and specifically about making people conform to them.  Then Uranus is “I gotta be me,” the one who marches to his own drummer.  Put those two together in the same package, and you have a certain kind of control freak, one who refuses to live in your world enough to deal with your agenda.  They just dance to their own drummer, and there’s no connecting with them on some level.

Saturn is in Gemini, ruled by Mercury, in the 9th house, ruled by Jupiter.  So those two are lit up.  Then Uranus is front and center, appearing in the 1st house.  I think of the 1st house as the face, and the 12th house the back of the head.  The 1st house and the Ascendant are what people see of you, the first take.  Then the 12th house is the part of yourself everyone else can see but you.  So wow, Omarosa has Pluto right on the Ascendant, same degree even.  Talk about a she-devil.

Pluto right on the Ascendant would tend to make someone sneaky, vindictive, confrontational, and controlling.  There are always at least two ways to use anything, but again, in this series I am dealing with known quantities.   As I said, if you don’t believe April Ryan that this woman threw an actual fit on White House security, cussing them out, or Symone Saunders that Omarosa jumped in her face at a conference, check her Pluto Ascendant.

That’s happening in the 1st decan of Libra, which gives her the amount of polish that she has, makes her camera-ready.  Because that is again my biggest take-away on this woman.  She could’ve been so many different things, so many different people.  She chose this on purpose.  She’s not sorry.  Having Venus on the Ascendant balances and smooths anyone out.  But aside from Pluto on the same exact degree, she also has Vesta the True Believer and Uranus, the chart co-ruler, in the 1st house.   Some modern astrologers consider all three outer planets malefic, Neptune (because of the addictions and integrity issues), Uranus (because of the weirdness and intractability), and Pluto (because of the rage and Machiavellian bullshit).  All of those things do come up when planetary influences are rough, or the way the native applies them are negative.

But really Uranus, or any other planet can be magical.  It’s a question of how the native has arranged their stars, that’s the reflection of their choice patterns.  Because that’s what this is all about, the choices we made on a higher level.  Our lives are the process of unraveling that mystery, and discovering why every bit of it is perfect for our highest good.  But you know, I doubt Omarosa feels that way about it, especially today, and this is her Astrosplain, so enough about me.

Vesta the True Believer in the 1st house, ruled by Mars, adds some rebar to the stubborn refusal to get on the same page with others that would come with her 1st House Uranus, even in genteel Libra.  This is a conflict-driven individual, underscored by the presence of Pluto, the devil, on the same degree as the Ascendant.

My take on the Symone Saunders incident is that that’s just how Omarosa plays.  She was intimidated in the big conference full of educated, organized black ladies.  She knows she is a craziness vendor for a living, and that her nonsense will not play here.  So she does what she would do in prison — and it would be awesome if she went to prison, that would make an amazing show.  But yes, so you walk in and jump the toughest one, to change the conversation from all the dumb things you say on TV all day.  Very obvious Plutonian move, manipulating with aggression.

But I don’t think she did anything at the White House but rub Trump’s rage boner with Breitbart articles, and keep track of who said bad things about him and what he should do for revenge.   To be clear that’s not a sexual innuendo.  If anything I believe Hope Hicks is more likely his comare, they have big chemistry.  But even if she didn’t use the wrong shade of foundation for him, Omarosa would scare the shit out of Trump as a woman with her totally aggressive attitude.  He’d be afraid to stick his junk in there, like there’d be a mouse trap.  He likes very Venusian, yielding women like Hope Hicks.

Also Trump of all people knows anyone who does the kind of things Omarosa is famous for can and will turn on you.  This guy is tight with Paul Manfort and Felix Sater, okay?  This is not his first appearance on Dancing with the Maniacs.  She wasn’t knowledgeable or valuable enough, or controllable enough, to do the weasel work with Russia and get herself jailed, I don’t think.  As the smarties of Twitter noted, Omarosa is a camera-ready version of Milton from Office Space.  And if you know your Milton archetype, not only does nobody know what he does there, but they stopped paying him a while back, and he kept coming in.  Omarosa is not coming in without the paycheck, and I’m sure she found every possible angle to exploit her work.  Saturn is a co-ruler of her chart, she counts the beans.  I was blown away by two things in April Ryan’s report above:  1.  Omarosa made $180,000 per year to be the stapler guy, and 2. She had an assistant for that shit.

But importantly, Milton was actually the hero of Office Space.  I won’t spoil it in case you haven’t seen this cult classic, because it’s amazing.  But the horrible place that nobody should be stuck in blows up, and hey, that’s not so bad.   It would be pretty amazing if Omarosa used her Machiavellian superpowers to collect a ton of evidence on everybody, like while they all thought she was just clipping the National Enquirer, she was wearing her own personal wire for insurance purposes.  She is exactly the person who would do that.   Don’t put it past her.  The difference between Omarosa and a coyote?  There are some things a coyote just won’t do.

One thing that blew my mind when I saw it was Omarosa’s Vesta on Seginus the Guard, in the 1st house.   I have been using Seginus, which adds shamelessness and loss through associations, as a Trump-specific marker.  Aside from the obvious relevance, our Jupiterian guy running the government also has Jupiter conjunct Seginus.  So that implicates the man and his administration.  And presto, magico, there it is, right on her face in the 1st house, and conjunct Vesta the True Believer no less.  Omarosa provides exactly what Trump likes:  someone who is loyal to the man, not the office.  Someone who comes across Plutonian, like Steve Bannon and Stephen Miller.  He likes tough guys, and again, I doubt she’s his flavor of ice cream, so for his purposes she’s another leg-breaker.  But yes, she has that Trump marker on Vesta of all things, and in her 1st house.  Gobsmacking.

Adding to the sour, bitterness of Omarosa is the 4th house ruled by Capricorn.  The 4th house is the home of Cancer, the opposite sign to Capricorn.  The 4th house is about our heart of hearts, the home we yearn for.  It’s how we really feel in our own space, and about our own lives.  So Capricorn, ruled by Saturn, gives that co-ruler a leg up, to compete with Uranus’ 1st-house location and other support.   And importantly, it makes that cold, hard, no-shits-giving feeling of Saturn come very naturally for Omarosa.  She has a prickly heart.

I am calling this a see-saw chart, enabling the native to take either side, move in either direction.  While for most people this can be a very useful sort of ability to compromise, as with Mike Pence, in Omarosa it adds to the highly Plutonian, confrontational, all-or-nothing vibe.  The see-saw can be a give and take, or it can be my way or the highway.  Which one do you think best fits Omarosa?  Then she’s got Venus, Juno, Taurus, and Ceres, all in a little row there, either in Capricorn or Aquarius, so all tinged by Saturn.

Before I leave this little hotbed of hate, I note that Venus, Juno, Toro, and Ceres is a pretty clear combination of factors.  Venus represents the woman, the Jane Doe in that sort of a reading, and all women generally.  In a woman’s chart it obviously represents herself as a woman, in society and in relation to her spouse and children, if any.  Ceres the Earth Mother is our nurturing, both give and take, the planet and our literal mothering.  Toro the Raging Bull is where we charge.  So I totally get Omarosa selling herself to Trump as one who will do anything, in that all-or-nothing Plutonian way, for her liege.   He gets that if he sics Omarosa on somebody, she will go for their jugular.  There will be no doubt in anyone’s mind.  That all comes very honestly to her.  Trump is her guy.

Interestingly her Pluto is at the head of a mini-kite.  The difference between a kite and a mini-kite is the presence of a grand trine, which Omarosa does have.  However Pluto is not in that trine, thus it’s not connected to the trine, the big blue triangle.  Pluto has a nice little circuit with the Moon and Neptune, and that all makes sense to me.   The Moon is in Leo, so ruled by the Sun, the ego.  Omarosa’s moods are clearly tied in with her self-image, I would say.  Pluto is greatly empowered, again, by its location directly on the Ascendant, and of course by this subcircuit of the mini-kite.

The Moon is opposition Ceres and Toro, which also makes perfect sense to me.  Omarosa is clearly a conflict-driven person.  That much Pluto is going to make a person changeable and emotionally volatile, capable of bursts of rage.  Then you add Toro the Raging Bull into the mix (which Harvey Weinstein has conjunct Uranus) and she sees red and charges, and that can be very much about projection.  Of course the Moon has no light of her own, she only reflects the Sun.   In the same way people interact with each other so that each can project their own experience into the physical world, and each can get the information and processes that they need.  People are never who we think they are, basically.  We can only see through our own eyes.  And the Moon can make it really hard to remember that.  It truly does seem to be the other people and the outside world, though it never really is.

So the Moon also represents the part of life that you can’t control, like dreams, moods, periods, when you get sleepy, all that.  As with Louise Linton, unfortunately you just can’t stop being affected by your own feelings anymore than the oceans can stop having tides.  The Moon does its thing all the time, even in the daytime.  In the same way your feeling self is always having some experience, whether you deal with it consciously or not.  And in this chart, I see a very conflicted Moon.  Early Leo has the flavor of an adolescent male, in terms of the ego and self-centered entitlement.  The boy king.  Then she’s in a T-square, the red triangle, with all the feminine planets in the Moon’s natural home, the 4th house, which is opposite its home in Capricorn.  So aside from the Moon being debilitated by her house being taken over by mean girls, the apex of the T-square is the chart co-ruler, Uranus.  The Moon is definitely getting her butt kicked.  It does not feel happy to be Omarosa, I don’t imagine.

Also, I note that her twisted Moon is in the 10th house, the house of career.  And her job does seem to have been putting Trump into a gnarly mood, like getting him to reflect the above-described way it feels to be Omarosa every day.

So many fancy things to look at in this chart, don’t let me forget that she has Neptune on Antares, ’nuff said.  Any strong Antares contact would make General McMaster hate her, with his Aldebaran.  But at a glance of course he would hate her, because he’s a general who has paid real dues to be where he is, and she’s Milton from Office Space.  And now that we know what a racist General Kelly is, I’m sure he only hates her 100 times more.  Everything he said to Ms. Wilson really sickened me, I have lost all respect for him.  But anyway I can only imagine how much he enjoyed having the Secret Service throw her out on her ass while she screamed obscenities like a crackhead.

The Antares thing is the sort of thing that would enable you to be an African-American spokeslady for Trump.  It’s a contrarian, anti-authority, raging at maturity sort of vibe.  Between her beleaguered Moon and her raging Pluto, that Antares is just like a pipe bomb that guarantees nothing good will come of it.  Neptune is, again, where we look for integrity, to see how much of the actual humanity is expressed in the life.   Antares sits opposite Aldebaran, the Royal Persian Star representing the archangel Michael.  So of course each star is an automatic access point for the other.  To choose one side, either the heroic Michael or the conflict-driven Antares, puts you squarely in the sights of those aligned with the other.  It is possible to use an Antares aspect to let past mistakes spur you to greatness, at least in theory.

Another thing that makes Omarosa perfect for Trump, and by no means a feminist, is her Nessus the Wife Beater conjunct Mintaka.  Omarosa knows exactly who Trump is, and she’s fine with it.  That Mintaka connection, again, is clearly from the opposite side than I’m on, based on what I can see of her life.  Nessus is not a huge chart factor, except for the 1st house Seginus, Uranus, and Vesta.  The fact that Trump is known as the pussy-grabber-in-chief strongly implicates Nessus, the one who violates sexual boundaries.

The counterpart to Nessus is of course Dejanira the Victim.  And hey, looky there, Omarosa has Dejanira right there on the Sun, combust even.  So the sense of victimhood is cooked into the sauce with her.  That’s what fuels that Plutonian rage, the sense of herself as the real victim, the one who deserves to be avenged.  I will absolutely pee my pants with happiness if Omarosa turns on all of them and tells all kinds of things they don’t think she knows.  OMG that would be so amazing.  And she will, like Papadopoulos.  These ego-driven people really don’t see it coming, they believe they are chosen.

Lastly, I should mention that Omarosa does have a Royal Star contact (other than the opposition to Aldebaran) with Mercury on Fomalhaut.  Like her Pluto neighbor Steve Bannon, Omarosa’s Sun is pretty far from her Mercury, in a different sign, even.  This suggests one who lives in their gut, not identifying so much with their thoughts, even in a Mercurial chart like Bannon’s, but with their feelings.  The Moon and the Raging Pluto (and with Bannon Mars), that stirred-up feeling of wanting to make them pay, is where those two live.  They are probably both quite un-self-aware, much too busy plotting their revenge.

Anyway as I’ve mentioned before, the Royal Stars can give amazing bandwidth, but they require the highest degrees of integrity.  I don’t see Omarosa having any integrity at all, or she’d have a real job.  I have no idea what sort of work she will be able to get after this, even Fox News won’t have her.  With her 1st house situation, she literally bet her whole life on Trump.  But no matter how much she identifies with the abuser in Nessus, bottom line, her Sun is conjunct Dejanira.   One of Omarosa’s famous quotes is, “If you’re not at the table, you’re on the menu.”  We can now see where Omarosa is, and when she sees it, I expect there will be hell to pay.  As much as I agreed with Angela Rye in the video above, I really hope she doesn’t kill herself or anyone else.





Steve Bannon, Astrosplained

To celebrate the Making of Alabama Great Again, gentle reader, I invite you to join me as I astrologically autopsy the bloated corpse of Steve Bannon.

steve bannon chart

So yes, it was super satisfying to see Steve Bannon hustle silently out to a black SUV after getting pounded in Alabama.  That looked to me like his Waterloo, but I’m pretty sure Waterloo is in Iowa, not Alabama, so I’m probably wrong.

Anyway first things first, and right off the top there’s a lot to understand.  The Sun is in Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter.  Then Jupiter himself is conjunct Mintaka, the fixed star I am using as the fascist/antifascist axis for purposes of this series.  I think it’s safe to say he’s on the other side from me.  Jupiter represents the government, and specifically Trump.  Trump is so strongly Jupiterian that almost everyone in his family has marked Jupiter, just as he is the Sun in their solar system.

So Bannon has Jupiter’s love of adventure, getting out there and making his mark, putting his name on things, being remembered.  Then Mintaka is all about taking things way too far, exploitation and cruelty on a scope and scale that cannot be sustained forever.  But Orion raged for a very, very, very long time.   I see that many of us who have this strong Mintaka connection are showing up on radar in our own ways, like me writing this blog instead of just stewing in my juices.

Bannon’s marked Mintaka Jupiter makes all the sense in the world.  And it’s sort of classic to have him be the guy with the wrecking ball, the guy who wants almost nobody working in the government.  At a glance, this chart looks to me like he thinks of all those boring suits at the State Department are just sandbags on his ankles, the Man holding him down when he’s trying to let his freedom flag fly.  He has almost said just that.   But of course that assumes that he IS the government, doesn’t it?  Like getting rid of the government will allow him the freedom to do the things he wants?  Seems straightforward to me, even if he hadn’t installed the orange menace.

So Jupiter is in Gemini in this chart, which explains Bannon’s role as “Trump’s brain.”  It’s dirty work, but somebody’s got to do it.   Bannon really was the architect of the current dumpster fire in the Oval Office.  So Mercury is the brain, the thoughts and words.  Interestingly because Mercury, the ruler of Gemini, is in Scorpio, that makes Jupiter, Mercury, and Pluto the key players in this chart.  Not so unlike Mike Pence.  And that might explain why Pence, of all the craven cardboard Christians in the GOP, slid into the No. 2 spot.  Because Pence doesn’t have a Seginus the Guard contact, which is the marker I’m using for Trump specifically due to his Jupiter/Seginus.   For me, a Seginus contact in a Trump-adjacent person is a direct tie to the man, not the office or the court.

Credit where credit is due, I believe Bannon is the one who extrapolated how to get Israel in bed with the Nazis by way of Trump.  I have to wonder how he feels about JKush‘s brilliantly nuanced Jerusalem strategy.

Also like Mike Pence, this is a bowl chart with no rim opposition, no red line across the middle.  The native’s consciousness does not wander into fully half of the life experience.  This tends to impart a certain “glass-half-full” pessimism and dissatisfaction.  I use the analogy of one who halves a recipe to save on ingredients, then is disappointed with how few cookies they get.  That will tend to keep someone with this Leo, Pluto/Moon situation very pissy.

And Bannon has Mars conjunct Toro the Raging Bull, conjunct Seginus the Guard.  This is really quite on the nose for me.  Bannon is a raging bull of a wingnut, the proverbial bull in the china shop of democracy.   Mars on Toro is self-explanatory, right down to the domestic violence allegations.  Bannon’s entire time in the government was one big tantrum against us all.   He used his Mercury, his cleverness and ability to talk to a lot of different people and connect a lot of dots.  He used his Martian, Plutonian rage to power through some crazy shit.  And then Jupiter, the man who would be king, is the driving engine behind it all.  Pluto and Jupiter combine here for rage at authority.

I’m not seeing a lot of Saturn here.  This isn’t about the rubles.  It’s about Bannon’s ego.  Anthony Scaramucci was fancy at press conferences, but he wasn’t necessarily wrong.  The thing is, not only does Bannon have a mellower Saturn than other Trumpets, he has a really big Moon problem.  I glanced over it without mentioning, but Steve has Neptune on Spica.  I have mentioned before, the Royal Star contacts (Spica sits under Arcturus, Heaven’s Gate) demand the highest levels of integrity.  Birds can rest on high-voltage wires because they’re not grounded.  In this analogy the ego would be the ground.  I don’t see Bannon having pulled that off.

I guard my integrity with my life, personally.  Things haven’t been easy for me, but they have definitely been worthwhile, and I will die happy, unlike Steve Bannon.  So personally I feel pretty great about my use of my fixed stars, and how I’ve processed Mintaka today, what I’ve done with the hand I was dealt.  Probably better than Bannon feels about his life, especially today.  ::sigh::

Another thing that makes Bannon probably moody AF is his problematic Moon.  Here the Moon is flanked by Pallas on one side and Pluto conjunct Juno on the other.  This all sits on Regulus the Heart of the Lion, speaking of Royal Stars not to mess with.  Regulus is a bit self-explanatory, the lion in his twilight days, the venerable warrior.  Pallas here is the field marshal, the visceral sense of battle weariness.  The Moon is our feelings and moods.    Any strong Leo can make someone kind of surly, like they need to feel the admiration of the throngs on a Tuesday morning or they get out of joint.   They can collect a lot of emotional taxes, especially somebody with this fierce Pluto and Mars.  Especially someone who drinks as much as Bannon is said to have joked about.  Any kind of escapism, addiction, or avoidance of reality is to be found in Neptune, but I’ll come back to that.   All in, the face of Steve Bannon is truth in advertising.

The Pluto/Juno conjunction is a little striking.  The neighbors used to complain about the noise coming from Bannon’s home, allegedly both from fights and parties, and there was a report of a hot tub damaged by acid.   I remember seeing some domestic violence complaints, which is very likely with the Mars/Toro and all that Scorpio/Pluto.  That is sustained rage, with outbursts.  Things that impinge on Jupiter’s need to kick his heels up probably feel like violent rape to Bannon.  He may literally think that corporate taxes and environmental regulations are as unpleasant to him as forcible sodomy is for others.  It makes him that angry, he feels that violated.

I have seen that Juno is not only the literal spouse, but the person or people you are energetically tied to on a daily basis.  For many people the ties to their partners can be as closer or closer than a marriage, as with Manafort and Stone.   Pluto represents the devil, the one who goes to the limit and beyond.  That automatically makes Pluto where we look for boundary violations, among other things.  But Pluto is also sneaky and underhanded, and most of all, vindictive.  Pluto doesn’t get mad, he gets even.  So this Juno conjunction may suggest a marriage to the devil, so to speak.  Or it may be a devil’s bargain to partner with him.  With Mars on Toro, his ex-wife would possibly agree.

Bannon’s Neptune doesn’t look that bad to me.  It’s square Uranus, which in this case I can see being sort of a willingness to overlook anything that doesn’t flip his switch.  Uranus can hold himself apart from others, so the Neptune square here looks like a way to externalize and dismiss other people, based on what I know of him.  He dismisses anyone he finds personally threatening, in other words, which I think is self-explanatory for the guy whose website is famous for words like “cuck globalist.”   Everything all of those people think is wiped away, just like that.

Interestingly Mercury here is quite far from the Sun, suggesting one who doesn’t so much identify with his thoughts.  Bannon is very much a gut-level guy, identifies with his Regulus Moon, which is of course conjunct Pallas and Pluto/Juno.  His Sun and Mercury are in different signs, with the chart ruler Jupiter in Mercury’s sign and Mercury in Pluto’s sign.  That’s a bit tangled, sorry.  But as clever as Bannon is, he lets his feelings, specifically his ego and rage, get the better of his thoughts.

Anytime you have a big empty patch of real estate, the center point becomes something of an energetic bull’s eye, a psychic vacuum crying to be filled.  If you think about the horoscope as a merry-go-round, you wouldn’t try to ride one that went halfway, reversed, and went back the same way, just back and forth.  You’d really want that smooth feeling of going around the circle, that energetic longing to experience the opposite side.   Sometimes people use this bowl chart configuration very well (for me), people like Bernie Sanders and Bob Mueller.  But God bless, they are both sour AF on a personal level, it seems like.  These are people who do not waver.  They don’t go all the way around life.  They stay extremely in their lane psychologically, missing out on everyone who doesn’t come right to them.  I’m speaking now about people I know personally, who are by no means rich or powerful.   Interesting to see how the zodiac levels people in a certain way, like breathing or blinking.  We all have the same setup on some level.

So Bannon, though, with that big empty patch, he has a mini-kite on the Moon/Pluto, the blue triangle, which is sort of aimed at the bull’s eye, which I put ~the first decan of Pisces, maybe 10.  Importantly, Pisces is co-ruled by Neptune and Jupiter.  I think of Pisces as a decidedly Neptunian sign, definitively so.  It took me a while to grasp what Jupiter has to do with Pisces at all, but of course we haven’t known about Neptune that long.  Anyway that’s interesting to me because of course Jupiter is the chart ruler.  With the Regulus Moon, there’s going to be a real feeling of entitlement.  So for Bannon, it could be almost like a switch, where he identifies with the Jupiterian part of Pisces and ignores the spiritual, giving side.  For me, Pisces is about dissolution into the One.  But of course it’s not dissolution, your consciousness regains full access to All That Is.  The only thing that dissolves is the boundary between self and others.  And that makes perfect sense, now that I think about it.  That feeling of wanting to have it all, every bit of it, like you were born to be king, explains everything I need to know about this once-influential person.

#FlowersAndSoil #HeilMueller












Ryan Zinke, Astrosplained

Gentle reader, today I am delving into the mysteries of our Interior Secretary, Ryan Zinke.  Many people don’t know who he is, or what he’s all about.  I admit to not having done any specific research on him.  His name has popped up a few different horrifying ways:  the utility company that screwed Puerto Rico blue were some nepotism hire of Zinke’s; the taxpayers are whining about his extreme travel expenditures; and in passing, a lot of terrible things are happening to our interior.

My take so far is that like Sam Clovis, Zinke performed his local role in a way that got him recruited for the Russian mob Trump administration.  So he traded what he knows about our natural resources for personal favor, much like Manafort tried to deliver the Oval Office to Oleg Deripaska.  But that’s all just a guess based on my passing observations.  So I will wrap my head around Ryan Zinke, this master of destruction, the only way I know how.

ryan zinke chart

First things first, the Sun is in Scorpio, so this is a Mars-Pluto chart.  I am giving him Saturn as a co-ruler, two for two on the Greater Malefics, Saturn and Mars.  Then many consider the three outer planets, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto, to also be malefic.  I disagree with them about all but Pluto.  I have intense Pluto in my chart, and I can tell you it’s really challenging to use it well.  It makes me really have to work on self-control.  I am not surprised to see both the shape and condition of Zinke’s fingernails.  I would expect someone with this amount of physical energy to be a nail-biter and a teeth-grinder.  The short, wide beds suggest a hypercritical, Saturnian bent at least on his Jupiterian/middle finger.

So because Scorpio is co-ruled by Mars and Pluto, having the Sun there can make a guy want to be the exact guy in the above picture, which is his official photograph.  Like the Marlboro man, he needs nobody but that one photographer.  Then he’s off to conquer the mountain and everything on it, because it is there.  The combination of Mars and Pluto, even without Zinke’s turbo Saturn, is a recipe for Alexander the Great.  The fact that we still call him Alexander the Great, instead of Alexander the Rampaging Sociopath,  is why we have President Trump, and thus why we have Ryan Zinke as Interior Secretary.  Because we’re doomed.  j/k

Back to Ryan.  So to be clear, I don’t like Ryan Zinke or the horse he rode in on, which was probably a Hummer that I paid for.  Saturn is the bean counter, the tax collector, the person you have to answer to.  Zinke believes he is that guy.  That’s one of the three legs of his psychological table, as strong as co-rulers Mars and Pluto.  Ayn Rand would totally masturbate to this photograph of him, like a guy from her book is now Interior Secretary.   Zinke has probably returned the favor with her books, I’m sure.  Saturn, that gut-level love of and entitlement to money, is conjunct Jupiter, late in his own sign of Capricorn.  Then Pluto, co-ruler of the Sun, is in Saturn’s other sign of Virgo, along with Uranus, the I gotta be me factor.  Really the whole thing is spelled out in the picture.

Saturn conjunct Jupiter in an elected official is almost surely one who overidentifies with his office, someone who could not stomach being anything but an authority figure.  Especially with Zinke’s intense Mars and Pluto, either of those can spark white-hot rage.  (Ask me, I know!)  So the Saturn influence will tend to be a slow burn in Virgo, where everything is super nitpicky, micromanaging the surface, and build up to a huge finale late in Capricorn when you own every single bean on the face of the planet, ideally.

Jupiter represents the government, large organizations, and importantly, living like a king.  Trump is very Jupiterian:  big fat guy with crazy looking hair, golfing while Rome burns.  Jupiter lights his cigars with $100 bills.  So Zinke isn’t exactly frugal per se, evidenced by the controversy over his lavish travel expenses.  Jupiter is about spending other people’s money whenever possible, especially conjunct Saturn, which is super selfish.  This whole chart screams that it’s Ryan’s world, the rest of us live in it on his good graces, even more than Bob Mercer’s.  This past weekend I have witnessed the after-life reviews of some similar people, and even though the ones I know were nowhere near as destructive as Zinke’s, it was ugly enough that I no longer care if he goes to jail or not.  The karma they’ve created for themselves is worse than any jail.  And I’m quite sure that if we discover Zinke has committed five horribly underhanded crimes against nature and humanity, he will have committed at least 10, because of his Pluto/Scorpio.

Just to underscore the Freddie-Kreuger-looking soul of this chart native, note that Nessus the Wife Beater is conjunct Vesta the True Believer, 1 degree apart.  The divine feminine exists to be punished by this individual, much like with serial killer John Bittrolff.  And with that ugly little chart feature, we have a little fun with orbs.  The stark brutality of Nessus conjunct Vesta is worsened by Ceres the Earth Mother conjunct Nessus.  This is an absolute disaster for Interior Secretary, literally the least appropriate person he could possibly have chosen.  This is in keeping with Steve Bannon’s wrecking-ball agenda.  Scorpios don’t get mad, they get even.  And that Saturnian sourness and sense of entitlement has everything to do with everything in this chart.

But the orb thing comes into play because both Ceres and Nessus are straddling the famous blinking demon, Algol.  Algol has an enormous magnitude and an orb of 2.4, on par with the Royal Stars of Persia.  But those four stars, including Fomalhaut, which is conjunct Chiron in this chart, are enormous benefactors for anyone with enough integrity to utilize their energies.  Algol can also be ridden to greatness, as Nikola Tesla did with his Uranus conjunct Algol.  But as with the other far-off, enormous stars, your integrity has to be very strong, or you will crash and burn, like General Kelly.

Zinke has another Royal Star contact, Regulus the Heart of the Lion.  That’s where he has Uranus, the I gotta be me planet.  This could be someone who is an iconoclastic leader, someone who would face any  enemy for the good of humanity.  Especially with Chiron on Fomalhaut, this could be one with a deeply felt sense of justice and the divine.  But with Nessus on Vesta conjunct Ceres, the opposite is much more likely.    Any Royal Star contact is one some level a contact with an archangel, a finger on the third rail.  So you can get access to energetic superhighways.  But small mistakes are fatal at higher speeds and pressures.  So integrity is key, keeping track of who you really are inside and not letting your ego run amok.  I don’t see Zinke having good integrity.

Then he also has Spica conjunct Mercury, which will again open up another huge pile of trouble for him if his integrity fails, as it seems to have done.  Spica adds brilliance, and I expect Zinke to be smarter than the average bear that he’s about to shoot while it’s hibernating.  The problem with Spica is that it’s directly under Heaven’s Gate, Arcturus.  So his mind is like standing in God’s spotlight.  In other words, God sees everything this guy is doing to the planet, no worries.

Zinke has the Moon conjunct the North Node.  My intuitive sense of that is that Zinke intended to learn the difference between his gut and his body.  As with Bittrolff, I think a lot of his abuse of women came purely from his physical need for sex, and the amount of Plutonian rage that boiled inside him.  I have no reason to think Zinke is a physical abuser of women, he seems to be focused on the divine feminine, aka the Earth.   Anyway for this kind of a manly man, he’s so focused in his physical body and his sense of himself as a man, a man with Uranus on Regulus, that he mistakes his anger for true grit.  The Moon is about intuition.  Zinke’s intense Saturn and Pluto are more likely to make him one who covers all the angles.  He probably thinks that’s what intuition is, and Scorpio can be quite intuitive too.  So he may have strong instincts.  But Pluto’s sort of intuition is more about vulnerability, perceived holes in another’s energy field.

The Moon is about perception of the holes in our own energy field.  Life is but a dream, and the people we encounter each day are actors playing roles.  It isn’t that they aren’t real, they are.  But your perception of them is happening from within your dream.  Not only do you not know the true identities of other people, you have no idea of your own larger self.  No matter how enlightened you are, how expanded your consciousness, if you’re walking around in a human body it only goes so far.  You can access all of the glory that is.  But you can only bring so much with you to the surface of the planet at any one time.  That’s what your integrity does for you.  Your Neptune creates the pipe through which you can bring your own divine energy and manifest it on the planet.

Anyway I don’t see Zinke developing that relationship to his higher self described above.  He has inconjuncts, or energetic redirections, from the Moon/North Node and Uranus to both Saturn and Jupiter.  The North Node is like psychic grammar, the period at the end of your life.   The Moon is where we feel our moods, and with this much Mars, Saturn, and Pluto, I don’t expect Ryan to be a happy-go-lucky guy on his best day, quite the angry white guy.  Again, the rulers of this chart are Mars and Scorpio, with secretive, vindictive, zealous, jealous Scorpio the Sun’s home.  That is where this person lives, Mars in Scorpio.  Pity those sleeping bears.

This set of redirections, and the roles of the planets involved, suggests that this is a specific circuit that his emotions do.  Jupiter and Saturn together late in Capricorn will make him take a very long and serious view of his own entitlement.  While Saturn and Capricorn are time-delayed and sober, if Jupiter can find a way to spend other people’s money, that’s a different question.  If he can spend other people’s money while lining his own pocket, that’s the sensible thing to do.  That allows him to express his massive anger.

So I think the Saturn/Jupiter thing just make him itch to go get his due.  Then the inconjuncts to the Moon, node, and Uranus, with all the intractable baggage of that area, just make him moody AF, someone who can’t be calmed the hell down.   I went to a place near Pagosa Springs, Colorado, which is amazingly beautiful and quite far from population centers.  Unfortunately it’s full of people on all-terrain vehicles, which are made to be as loud as possible.  It’s like an army of mechanical cockroaches infesting the mountain.  I couldn’t find anywhere to be alone without man-made noise anywhere on that mountain, because of guys like Ryan Zinke.   I found them to be incredibly hostile, both consciously and unconsciously.  You are on their mountain, don’t get in their way.  Ironically I found a place to just pull off the road that was much quieter than right on that river.  Anyway.

So there are a lot of things to look at in this chart.  None of them are going in a good direction IMHO.  I should also mention Zinke has Venus conjunct Seginus the Guard, which is a fixed star that Trump has conjunct Jupiter.   Because of Trump’s bigtime Jupiter and the extreme Jupiter in his immediate family members’ charts, I am using Jupiter as a marker for Trump when appropriate and Seginus as a Trump-specific marker.  Seginus has the property of shamelessness and loss through associates.   This entire administration has a “lie down with dogs, get up with fleas” feeling for me.  Just as some people think Trump is the golden brand, many of us see it quite the opposite way.  Paint yourself with the poop brush all you want, Ryan.



Mike Pence, Astrosplained

Every morning as soon as I get up I check to see if Santa Mueller came early and left me the indictments I asked for.   While we await Bob and Rudolph, gentle reader, let’s meet the vice-traitor-in-chief, Indiana’s Favorite Christian, Mike Pence.

Mike pence chart

First things first.  The Sun is in Gemini, so Mercury is the chart ruler.  Mercury is combust, very close to the Sun and thus obscured within its corona.  Mercury rules the conscious mind, the thoughts and words.   Trump is highly Mercurial, and this is reflected in his flightiness, short attention span, verbal diarrhea, switching parties at will, and overall superficiality.  These are of course the less-evolved parts of Mercury.  Credit where credit is due, Pence was the governor of Indiana, a person who seems to have worked his way into his current position.   For our intents and purposes here, Mercury is the Liaison, the Fixer.

Importantly for my purposes, Pence’s ruling Mercury is on the same degree as Mintaka, which I am using as the fascist/antifascist axis marker in this Astrosplained series.  So that part of my hypothesis bears out, because Pence is arguably worse than his boss, due to Trump being an honest liar, if that makes sense.  Trump says he’s Christian too, but Pence believably pretends to be, like actually does the steps, so people believe him.  I hear someone asking, “Hey, Artnunymiss, you’re talking a lot of crap about someone else’s religious beliefs.  How can you judge their sincerity?”  Well, first of all, I’m snarky AF.  But also I use astrology as a way of decoding an individual’s life choices.   I have the luxury of taking what I have seen of the person and their public words, and comparing it to what the ancients have been saying all along.

In this case, there are a couple of red flags for Pence not being who he claims to be.  The primary place to look for integrity is Neptune.  It doesn’t seem right to me that he could have Neptune in Scorpio being 5 years older than me, but I place my faith in  So Neptune has its own mini-kite, as does Pluto.  Pluto is conjunct Regulus here, the Royal Persian Star called the Heart of the Lion.  Pluto represents the devil, as discussed here and here.  As with all of the Royal Stars, impeccable integrity is what it’s all about.  Like with General Kelly, who I am sorry to say has proven my suspicions correct, higher speeds and pressures require impeccable integrity.  And none of these jokers have it, possible exception of General McMaster.  But I don’t have confidence in him based on the company he keeps.

Importantly, not only is Pluto conjunct Regulus ruling over Neptune here, Neptune is square some important business:  Venus, Mars, Uranus, Dubhe, and Vesta.  Venus and Mars are obviously personal planets.  And I actually like the way he lets Mother Pence call the shots.  That’s the one part of his Christianity that I appreciate.  Karen Pence is a boss in a plain brown wrapper for sure.  You can’t pick her out of a line-up, but look where she is.  Has anyone ever seen her and Cheney standing together?  But so Neptune is about who you really are, and whether you express that or not.   I would say with this little cluster of items squared Neptune, that’s a hard no.  Mike Pence is a secret.

Venus and Mars are the personal planets, and this Neptune issue would serve to feel one way and act or be seen another.  Like the thing of not being alone with the opposite sex, ever, it’s about perceptions.  I wish people didn’t hassle them about that.  As an Italian-American, I appreciate that.  Our guys feel like as long as you don’t take your comare to the same restaurants as your wife, she has nothing to complain about.  As a sexual assault survivor, I also appreciate knowing for sure that Mike Pence is a safe space.  I like it that he respects his wife enough to keep it that way, even when the world is fucking with him about it.  That is actual Christianity IMHO.

But the problem is the whole mix, not the individual nuts.  To be clear, Uranus is an outer planet, the “I gotta be me” factor as evidenced in Jeff Sessions and the murder-adjacent Dr. Hackett.  There is a difficulty in getting close to such people, because they don’t allow it, especially in a Mercury-dominated chart.  Tesla is another famously Uranian personality, with Uranus on Algol, though clearly with different ideas about integrity and humanity than Mike Pence.  So that Uranian insistence on doing it your own way, different than the societal norm, conjunct Venus and Mars, makes perfect sense for the dining considerations discussed above.  And that works perfectly, because it sets Mike Pence up to look like a wimp, as though Trump wasn’t the most pussy-whipped guy alive.  (He is.)

If you are old enough to remember the prior ass-grabber-in-chief — another one, okay — George H.W. Bush, who is still grabbing asses every chance he gets, people used to call him a wimp.  When he was Vice President, they made him out to be a Nowhere Man, a sad sack.  He’s playing the same sneaky AF card Pence is now.  My first thought was, “Director of the CIA a wimp?  Um, no.”   Passive-aggressive, yes.  Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.   They downplayed Cheney as much as his face would allow, too.  Here’s Pappy Bush, in a wheelchair with literally multiple flavors of baby food on his shirt, grabbing a horrified writer’s ass.  Clanking balls, all of them.

George Bush Christina Kline

As a locomotive chart, this is 15 degrees from a bowl, which would fit the sort of staunch politics he’s associated with.  But it extends far enough out to create a large amount of drive, with a big psychic hole to fill.  As a locomotive, this chart has a Sun engine, meaning Pence is ironically a this-world-focused guy, famous for being Christian.  As with Louise Linton’s Moon, Gemini and Mercury are the opposite of deeply felt.   Mercury keeps it breezy, chitty chatting and moving on to the next thing.  It can help someone as ideologically rigid as Pence come across as a nice guy, easy to talk to, approachable. Because as intense as he is about his agenda, he was willing to work for the opposite guy.  That’s very sneaky and Plutonian,  maneuvering.  Mercury keeps it light.  But Pence still got to be Vice President, and he’s not a nepotism hire.  So that’s a stealth skill, like with Hope Hicks (who I didn’t realize came to the White House via working for Ivanka.  That’s an extreme ninja move, and I am awed.  I’m still okay with her going to jail, but I don’t think she will.)

Back to Mike.  If you de-crapify this chart and look at the usual chart factors, again, it also looks very much like a see-saw.  And it could be one.  As with Bob Mueller’s “slingshot” bucket within a bowl, it’s possible for one person to express both styles simultaneously.   A locomotive would make it easier for him to get somewhere.  A see-saw would make it easier to work both sides of the fence, and I do see him in the Liaison/Fixer role.  The North Node is the only routine chart factor in the middle there, and it is not a planet.  I’ll come back to that.  Whether locomotive or slingshot, I don’t see Mike being deeply heartfelt about his ideologies, only extra rigid in adhering to them due to the Uranus/Dubhe/Vesta thing and Regulus.   When it suits him to flip flop, like being Christian Mike Pence and Vice Pussy Grabber simultaneously, Mercury kicks in and he switches.

So if you look at it as a see-saw, it’s almost evenly balanced, so quite Mercurial in the ability to go either way, like his boss.  He also has a 1st decan Capricorn Saturn, like his buddy and future cellmate Jefferson Beauregard Sweet Tea Sessions.   That double Saturn early in Capricorn is about taking as much response-ability as possible, grabbing hold of it right away and clinging to it for dear life.  The sort of person who starts saving for his retirement in middle school.   Saturn is focused on the finest details.  Saturn reads the fine print every time, because he wrote it, and he’s making sure it’s exactly how he wants it.  Saturn is about authority and demanding.  So that’s his rigidity.  Saturn is cold, sour, and sad, and opposition the Moon it has to be a huge bummer for his moods.  It’s possible he always appears to be in the same mood, though with that much Pluto and this Moon configuration his emotions are probably a mess.

While I’m looking at this chart as both a see-saw and a locomotive (hat tip to Bashar, who points out that it’s always this AND that, because all possibilities exist at once) the fly in the ointment is the little cluster around the North Node in Libra.  I do show different chart factors for every chart, because I am a self-taught, intuitive astrologer.  I am grateful to the lovely Del O’Connor of Chicago for getting me started on the basics in my youth.  But I move my eyes around the chart and see different holograms, and I follow them where they lead.

Anyway the point is, that little cluster around the node does not include a planet.  It includes asteroids Juno the Spouse and Pallas Athena.  Algorab the Crow, a very common marker for kleptocrats and thieves generally (like Roger Stone and Paul Manafort), is 20 seconds out of orb for the whole kerfuffle.  As I’ve said elsewhere, the more astrology I do, the looser my orbs get.  Algorab is implicated IMO, because the Node is such a sensitive spot, and because of the company Pence keeps.  He doesn’t have Seginus the Guard, which is Trump’s Jupiter star, the one tinkling on the whole administration and telling them it’s raining.  And non-Trumpets also have Algorab.  I’m just seeing a lot of those two, is all.  But it’s interesting that he doesn’t have the Seginus, Trump-specific marker.  He is absolutely not a Trump guy.

However the presence of Juno and Pallas together, especially in this superficial chart, with all this Plutonian intensity and secrecy, can only point to his wife having a whole lot more to say than people think.   I have come to see Juno as representing not only the spouse, but the people one calls and texts all day, the closest ones in your orbit.   As described above, I am calling Pence something of a faithless partner, one who is not there to praise Caesar but biding his time until he can bury him.  I think that’s pretty straightforward from the chart, if not the palace intrigue.

So I have begun a number of threads that I need to pick back up.  The little cluster including Venus, Mars, Uranus, and Vesta also includes Dubhe the Back of the Bear.  From the link above:

Constellation Ursa Major is like Mars. It is said to give a quiet, prudent, suspicious, mistrustful, self-controlled, patient nature, but an uneasy spirit and great anger and revengeful when roused. [1]

Astrologically both Bears were said to presage an evil influence. They are particularly injurious as regards to the affairs of nations and kings. [2]

Bob Mueller has a Dubhe contact, as do Hitler and Mao.  I think it’s safe to say that Dubhe makes one a bear to deal with.

Now, Dubhe is a “fixed” star, one that is so far away, and moves so slowly, that from our vantage point it appears not to move at all, like 1 degree in hundreds of years.  So in order to activate a fixed star contact, the orbs are pretty tight.  Jamie has done the math at the link above, and gives exact orbs for the fixed stars, hat tip to him for the reference.  But he gives 2.4 degrees for Royal Stars and others of that magnitude, which is the max.  Most are about 1 degree.

So with that orb, many astrologers believe only Uranus is conjunct Dubhe.  Uranus is stretching the orb to be conjunct Mars, and then technically out of orb for Venus.  Then Vesta might not be seen as conjunct Dubhe, because it is out of orb for Dubhe.  But Vesta is an asteroid, much closer in, and is conjunct Uranus.  I have come to see that it’s more like how a veneral disease spreads:  one makes contact with another, then that contact extends to everyone contacted by the second one.  So once Dubhe gets into the mix with Uranus, and Uranus connects with Vesta, then everything that’s bouncing off of Neptune is there bouncing off the same thing at the same time, if that makes sense.  I see them as like lights that light each other up.  You may not be able to see a specific one very clearly in the group, and their collective light helps you see all of them.

Importantly Vesta the True Believer is in that mix with Uranus, the I gotta be me factor.  Then add in Pluto, and his extensive influence with Scorpio, and it’s quite Machiavellian.  Pence feels things very, very deeply.  He just keeps his deep stuff hidden with everyone but his wife.  With Ceres in Scorpio, I expect his mother was the same way.  Such women are so much stronger, so much more self-controlled that Donald Trump can imagine, that they literally run circles around him without showing up on his radar.  They are smart enough to know how to stay off his radar.  I’m surprised we’ve heard in the media that Mother Pence dislikes him, she must be ready to kill him.  Well, that’s what you get for being a Christian lady who stands for pictures with him.

Anyway Neptune, Ceres, and Jupiter are all in Scorpio, co-ruled by Pluto and Mars, who is in Leo conjunct Venus and Uranus.  Leo is ruled by the Sun, the ego, the individual’s sense of self and why they are here on this planet.  Having both Uranus and Vesta in Leo would make one who believes very deeply in the rightness of himself, and being true to himself.  Pluto on Regulus makes for one who believes himself not a king among men, but an emperor among peasants.  Then you add the chart ruler conjunct Mintaka, and Mike Pence is not my sort of person at all.

Did you think this chart would be so flavorful?  I didn’t.  I knew he was a liar, an empty shirt.  I knew that he wants almost the opposite policies than I want.  But I didn’t get how deeply clever he really is, or how hardcore his wife is.  With Juno conjunct Pallas in Scorpio, she is definitely a behind-the-scenes field marshal.  He may have other field marshals, and probably does.  Again, this is the chart of a Fixer, not an ultimate boss.  Pluto on Regulus may feel entitled to rule the world, especially with with Saturn opposition the Moon.  I can only imagine that keeps him consistently feeling wronged.

Saturn opposition the Moon makes sense for one who attempts to control the behaviors of other people and make them conform to his values, like with abortion.  The Moon is about recognizing that other people only reflect of our internal states, they don’t create them.  Then Saturn is about the material world, the letter of the law, and being an authority figure.  When people don’t get it about projecting, and think that other people are really the problem, and their behaviors need to be corrected, that is Saturn and the Moon being off-kilter.  It doesn’t feel that way, it feels like the other people really are the issue.  But that can never be the case, because it’s your life.

So the bull’s eye, the center of the big empty spot in the chart, by my calculation is right in the last few degrees of Pisces.  Pisces is co-ruled by Jupiter and Neptune.  I’ve already touched on the highly complicated Neptune of Mike Pence.  But his Jupiter is tricky, too.  Pence has Jupiter inconjunct, or redirecting/redirected by Mercury, the combust chart ruler.  Jupiter represents the government, and here it is in Scorpio, the sneaky, passionate sign of Pluto and Mars.  This would have to help Pence hold his nose and put on the “I’m with Stupid” T-shirt.  Pence is able to restrain and redirect himself however he needs to.

Then Saturn is redirecting/redirected by Venus and Mars, further underscoring how easy it is for Pence to not be seen in public with women, ever.  That Saturnian ability to redirect while remaining firm is like an oak tree that is slightly bendy.

The last few degrees of Pisces is an interesting spot, where the zodiac comes to an end.  It’s said to be a fairly magical spot, and it features prominently in the charts of people like Harvey Weinstein.  I believe Pence has enough sense of his own Plutonian evil to be somewhat aware of the divine, though if my assessment is correct he wouldn’t be able to access it because his integrity is too poor.  But he can probably see the magic, knows it can happen.  That’s why he’s a fundamentalist, he sees the power of the Holy Spirit in people’s lives.  He just doesn’t get what it means to connect with it.  I will be okay with him dying in prison.






Jared Kushner, Astrosplained

Now that he’s quite possibly going to jail, I invite you, gentle reader, on a journey into JKush.  You might bring a book, because I warn you, this is not an interesting man.

jared kushner chart

First things first, Jare Bear’s Sun is in Capricorn.  So Saturn is the ruler of this chart.  This is not surprising, that Jared has a physical, material focus.  Jared strikes me as a guy who really likes money.  His real estate company is famous for its “tenant clawbacks.”  Saturn himself is conjunct Jupiter in Libra in this chart.  Jupiter represents the government, and specifically Trump, who is quite Jupiterian.  (Trump has Jupiter conjunct Seginus the Guard, making that a Trump-specific marker.  JKush doesn’t have any Seginus or Algorab contact.)

Saturn conjunct Jupiter, especially in the beautifully balanced Libra, suggests one who can come across as that unflappable rock of strength that Trump so desperately craves, the counterweight to the perpetual tsunami in his head.  Libra keeps everything very pleasant and comfortable on the surface, which is something Trump needs.  Saturn provides some rebar, some structure upon which to develop policies.  But how much of it does Jared have?  Sending him to use that squeaky little voice on an Israeli journalist was just asking for trouble.  Libra pushes everything toward a calm surface.  This was a classic example of “out of one’s depth.”

With the chart ruler Saturn in Libra, Venus is also an important planet.  Venus is about dissolving, being easy.  Venus, the feminine archetype, is about being passive and submissive, not holding fast and demanding — that’s Saturn.  Importantly, Trump’s hypermasculine approach pretty much demands this of people, I would think.  Like Hope Hicks with her extreme Venus, I expect Trump to be personally comforted by this individual’s presence, that he would crave that Venusian willingness to accede.  Venus doesn’t care what the issue is, she wants it resolved.  She stickles no principle but her own need for acceptance.

For me, the way Jared has Saturn running the show while hiding out in Libra acting like Venus is pretty passive-aggressive, like the whole tenant clawbacks thing.   Jared likes money (Saturn, Venus), being in charge/making decisions for others (Jupiter), and avoiding (not resolving) conflict (Libra).  Then he has Vesta the True Believer in Virgo, Saturn’s nitpicky, superficial sign.  That tenant clawback concept works for Jared on every level.  Virgo loves the fine print, especially when it lets him charge you extra.   Then Jupiter lights his cigars with $100 bills, and Venus is an online shopper.  And I bet Jared has never had to discuss clawbacks face-to-face with anyone who didn’t work for him.

Another thing to note about this chart, it is a bowl.  Could technically be considered a wedge, maybe, I’d have to look that up.  But it’s in six signs, so I’m calling it a bowl.  I talk so much crap about bowl charts on this blog, but of course anything can be used either well or badly due to free will.  The classic feature of a bowl chart is called a “rim opposition,” a red line across the center of the chart with all of the planets on one side, like Bob Mueller has.  That’s the psychic line in the sand, which the native stubbornly refuses to cross.  Jared doesn’t have that opposition, furthering the Libran, easygoing tone of this chart.  Jared is kind of oatmealy, he’s able to appear to be whoever you want him to be.

But bowl charts are truly intractable.  They cannot see it your way.  When you meet them where they’re at (which is what you must do to interact with them) they feel like that is the middle.  The classic bowl mindset is rather sour, like Saturn, which adds delay, coldness, and depression to everything it touches (again the opposite of Venus).   He and Ivanka are both very parochial people, with her even deeper in their shared bubble.  But these are people who only relate within a very small circle.  Stuff from outside that circle of influence literally does not enter their minds, ever.

A bowl is a chart in which the native’s energy is only going halfway around his life.  The bowls I have known and loved are frankly miserable people, whether they have rim oppositions or not.  My analogy is a person who halves a recipe to save on ingredients, then is disappointed by the low yield.  Bowl natives often do not pursue fully half of life, and have glass-half-empty lives as a result.  With or without a rim opposition, bowl natives have a very difficult time seeing things anyone else’s way.  Saturn rulership will tend to exacerbate that quality, as Saturn is impossible to please.

Then Venus herself is either at the end of Sagittarius or the beginning of Capricorn (I don’t have a proper birth time to know for sure.)  Sagittarius would link back to Jupiter, Capricorn back to Saturn, which are conjunct here and thus acting as one.  I would almost put the two of them into a giant conjunction with Venus, sort of, due to the mutual receptivity, where planets inhabit each others’ signs like guests in each others’ homes.  They are automatically tuned into and beholden to each other.  Those three are carrying this chart like a troika.  He’s about being a bigshot authority figure, having tons of money, and keeping everything pleasant and nonconfrontational.  Whatever else happens in his life is bonus.  He’s probably a picky AF eater and may spend more time on health and grooming than Czarinka.

In terms of the wacky stuff I look at in charts, there are a few notable points.  JKush has Pluto on Spica.  Pluto is slow-moving and considered “generational,” because it stays in one place for a while.  However, everything plays into everything, always.  So how it fits into the other chart factors is still unique and important.  Based on what I know of him, Pluto on Spica doesn’t bode well for young Jared.  Like Bob Mueller might actually fit this joker for a pair of cufflinks that I would LOVE.  Importantly Pluto co-rules Scorpio, which is where he has Juno the Spouse.  That fits Czarinka’s Scorpio influence.

You see, Spica sits directly under Arcturus, or heaven’s gate.  Arcturus is the door to the higher self, where integrity is the only question.  I define integrity as integration, how well every aspect of the life is integrated into the native’s consciousness.  I would suspect Jared of having very low integration overall, as described in the tenant clawback issue above.  Avoiding conflict can be the opposite of resolving it, which is what you need to do to anything with God’s spotlight, Spica, shining on it.

Pluto, as described in Stephen Miller’s Astrosplain, is about our darkest urges.  Pluto can get a bad rap because bad people often let their Pluto run amok.  But again, anything can go either direction depending on how you use it, anything can be used to avoid.  But Pluto is about aggression.  So if your Mercury goes off the rails maybe you have OCD or verbal diarrhea, but when your Pluto gets loose other people get hurt.  Pluto is about controlling the material world and the people in it, on a more direct and visceral level than Jupiter.  Jupiter loves being a bigshot.  Pluto loves being feared.

The point here is that integrity challenges don’t bode well for royal star contacts like Spica.  Pluto is the aggressive part that he and Czarinka both clearly have.  Our society is currently dysfunctional in such a way that many people truly do not understand the difference between politeness and passive-aggression.  Politely nodding and ignoring people while they speak to you is, in my estimation, very aggressive, even if you use respectful words and tone.  In other words, when those two are being pleasant and non-confrontational, I know they’re up to some shit.  Like his wife pretending to not know the meaning of the word complicit.  The fact that he has asteroid Toro the Raging Bull conjunct Pluto may help account for his ingenious plan to light Jerusalem on fire.  That’s how willing he is to charge with his feet that far from the ground.

So other wacky chart factors that I happen to use include the domestic violence asteroids, Nessus and Dejanira.  JKush has Nessus the Wife Beater conjunct Ceres the Earth Mother in Cancer, the sign of the early home life.  His dad is a super sleazy weirdo, as it sounds like the rest of his family is, too.  I’m not going to look up research links on them, sorry.  They aren’t worth it to me.  These are not interesting people, again, just run-of-the-mill selfish losers.  Anyway it would not surprise me if his father were physically violent with his mother, which is the straightforward interpretation of this conjunction.

Lastly, Jared also has Neptune opposition Mintaka, the fixed star I began this series with, the one I think of as the fascist/antifascist axis of human experience.  Jared is involved with fascism as I see it, specifically on the other side of it from me.  Neptune is the planet we use to either have integrity or not.  I think the clawback thing, aside from the whole thing of wanting to have walkie talkies with Sergei Kislyak, suggests Jare Bear is a lower-integrity sort of guy.  I am comfortable calling him an agent of fascism who does not think of himself as such, who tells himself whatever feels good, like his wife with complicity.

Hopefully they can keep him kosher in jail, because I do not believe in cruel and unusual punishment or degrading prisoners, even people like Jared Kushner.  He should be treated like a human being while he languishes in prison hopefully for the rest of his life.





Jane’s Career, Astrosplained

There are so many creeps and criminals on this blog lately, I thought I’d Febreeze the place by helping a promising young lady get some perspective.  I don’t have a picture of Jane, so I’ve loaned her my profile picture from my other blog.  For this Astrosplain, I’ll be the confused sphinx in the background.

Jane wrote:

I am interested the field of Computer Science but I’m not sure if I would fare well or if I can nurture a liking in the field.   I’d like to know if there are any other career options from my birth chart too.

This is a really interesting chart with one, two, THREE yods.  In all the charts I’ve reviewed on this chart so far, I’ve seen a total of one, on Don McGahn.  Not sure if Jane can master the tie-over-shoulder, tousled-hair look that got McGahn into the big chair.   But she has a crazy amount of Saturn in her chart, so I’m sure she can do something useful.

Gentle reader, meet Jane.

Jane asteroids chart

So Jane, first thing I will say is you may come on very strong.  People may really not know how to take you a lot of the time.  I have really never seen a chart like this, so am not quite sure how to interpret some things.  I will use the methodical, systematic approach that I suspect you would prefer anyway.

Step 1, the Sun is in Virgo.  Your Sun is conjunct Toro the Raging Bull.  Saturn is your chart ruler, and he rules here with an iron fist.  Nobody dares question the authority of Saturn in this chart, but nobody — except Venus.  Heh.  Still I am concerned that you may be your own little Hitler, persecuting yourself.  Saturn loves to beat somebody up and tell them what to do.   Saturn always knows that he is right, and he is owed.

It was pointed out that I am biased in my Astrosplaining.  I’m obviously using astrology for political satire to some extent.  But importantly, I have thought about what I know of the person and compare it to what I see in the chart.  I am ready to be surprised.  But I don’t write all of my thoughts on a subject for obvious reasons.  Anyway it’s important to note that you are a younger person than I normally write about.  You are a woman, in an Asian country, just starting out. So a fresh page in a delightful way.  I am very grateful to have this opportunity to share my perspectives.  I have confidence that you can do great things.

I mention your location because sometimes Asian families emphasize education not in a liberal arts sense, in terms of what would make you happy, but as a means to a foothold in society.  This is often not just for yourself, but for your entire extended family.  I have known Asians whose parents basically arranged education the way they arrange marriages, for the same reason.  Your interests are irrelevant.  It doesn’t seem like you’re under that degree of pressure, though I wonder how computer science was selected, possibly not by you but by older people who see that field booming, and because of your 1st house Uranus in Aquarius.

This may or may not be your case.  But even in western families there is really a lot of pressure to get an education that will work for you and others who depend on your income and profession.  This has not been such an easy world to make your way in, though I see that changing.   The good news is, I believe you can find work that will both excite you and pay the bills in a credible way.  The key to your success is, like with everybody else, knowing yourself.  Know your own heart, your own motivations, and your core values.

I said I was going to be methodical.  Well, I used my extreme Neptune and gave an alternative fact.  I need to skip ahead here to your core values, what’s at the bottom of your heart.  Because while all your raging Saturn is scouring the ground for clues, your heart is screaming the answer you seek.  It’s really that easy.  You can trust yourself, because you have amazing gifts.  Once you relax into them, you will know whether they are righteous or not.  You know which path to follow.  The only thing that makes it hard is Saturn.  Saturn keeps you away from the path to your heart.  But Vesta the True Believer is where that eternal flame lives.  And your Vesta is very telling.

You have Vesta at 28:59 Cancer in the 7th house.  Since it is 1 second away from 29 degrees, I’m giving you both Kozminsky symbols.  I believe these two symbols show the nature of your core conflict quite well.

28º Cancer: An old mill-wheel lying on the bank of a lily pond, with pretty creepers growing over it.
Denotes one whose life will be peaceful and whose marriage will be blessed. His desires are simple and his talents are natural. He does not wish to rule in the world of men. His mental attitude and manner of living form a magnetic point of help and sympathy where the world-worn may have balm for their wounds. It is a symbol of Charm.

29º Cancer: A man in a prison cell, a ray of light flowing through the bars, on which a little bird stands singing.
Denotes one liable to be bound soul and body, who will be restricted in action and desire. But even so he may yet release his true self and meet the force flowing from the fountain head. Thus, though one side may frown and obstruct him, the other will smile and release him. It is a symbol of Obstruction.

Saturn is the one who constricts and closes in.  Venus in Libra is the one who does not wish to rule in the world of men.  Her attitude and manner of living form a magnetic point of help and sympathy where the world-worn may have balm for their wounds.  Venus in Libra is the picture of charm.  And there’s your Midheaven on Spica, in Libra.  So this is a flashing neon arrow as to which of the two choices is better for you.  Saturn himself is in Libra’s sign of Taurus, in Cancer’s 4th house.  So you’ve set things up for a male-female conflict, where there is a tyrant in Saturn, who ultimately answers to Venus.  I see the Moon as another benefic in your chart, supporting Venus.  I will talk more about her later.

Your Saturn has this entire chart in a death grip, in that prison cell.  But with those three yods, you can not only see the bird, you can see all kinds of things.  You may not have taken the time to imagine them or work with them, because Saturn tries to keep you always judging, criticizing, picking nits, and dumping ice water on everything.   Saturn is cold, unhappy, and unforgiving, really the opposite of Venus.  The Moon, your ability to actually feel other people, to empathize, that is your superpower and the way to get the reins in your chart.  (I really am being kind of methodical, it just doesn’t look like it.)

Saturn, my dear, is really a cautionary tale for you.  Your Neptune can work beautifully with the Moon, because of their natures, and because Venus is ruling Saturn, ruling Neptune.  But you will have to train yourself to use your intuition in that specific way, because your Neptune thinks he’s working for Saturn, in the rock hard old-man-chair of 29 Capricorn.  It’s like Neptune has such a mean, bossy supervisor (Saturn), that he might forget the supervisor works for the big boss, Venus.  Neptune is important, in the 1st house.

I see your Neptune as being one who works to deceive you that the outside, material world is more important.  But with your Pluto, Moon, yods, and Arcturus contact (by way of Spica), you can be masterfully intuitive and really write your own ticket.  The biggest concerns for you are guarding your integrity (Royal Stars, Neptune) and not buying into materialism (Saturn running amok).  Note that many of the miscreants I Astrosplain, like the serial killers and democracy murderers, have runaway Saturn.  You can use your powerful Moon to see such people as the Ghosts of Christmas Future, the ones you don’t want to be like.  This is why I cautioned you not to seek a position of authority for yourself, no matter how strong that urge may be.  It will not make you happy.  Connecting with others from deep within your truth will.  The harmony and balance that Venus loves, that’s the empty spot your locomotive is charging toward.

In terms of how your yods will play themselves out, this is something that you are going to have to work with and discover for yourself.  Pluto is the one that redirects the Moon and Saturn.  The yod configuration gives you a way to receive those internal GPS reroutes automatically.  It’s great that you love astrology, because learning your own chart, watching it play out in your chart, is a great way to apply all that Saturn.  You can document and look things up like a maniac.  You will be able to connect dots that nobody else can, like a walking database.

The Moon is not only right where she likes it, in Cancer, she has her own yod from Pluto to Uranus.  The bad news, she’s in Saturn’s 6th house of health and service.  But she has a mini-kite, and her own yod with Pluto and Uranus.  Uranus is in his own sign of Aquarius.  However that is co-ruled by Saturn.  So Saturn has fingers in a lot of pies in this chart.   Again, I can’t overemphasize what a bummer Saturn is, how he never stops criticizing, judging, disapproving, and putting down limitations.  I am old enough to be your mom, and I’m still working on helping friends older than myself learn to tell Saturn to just STFU.  Know that you have this aggressive unhappiness the way some people know they have diabetes.  You have to work around this constantly, or it will kill you.

Your Saturn is in Taurus, ruled by Venus.  So you have an interesting femininity axis here, with the superficial, hostess side of Venus displayed on the Midheaven, conjunct the spouse asteroid, even.  But in your heart, in the 4th house (which is extra important because of Saturn and because the Moon is actually very strong in this chart) is the other side of Venus, the lazy, selfish one, like Melania.  Saturn and Taurus are both known for stubbornness, even without a Capricorn Ascendant.  There’s a sense of guilt about self-love, as though the public sacrifice is imperative.  Saturn makes things feel obligatory and generally horrible, even when they really aren’t.  (Ask me, I know!)

About your career, your 10th house is auspicious with Libra and Spica (Arcturus) on the Midheaven.  You have Juno in the Gauquelin sector, suggesting that you may become famous with or have a famous spouse or partner.  However you do have several factors that concern me about you being taken advantage of by such a person.  Among other things, you have Juno conjunct Seginus the Guard.  Trump has Jupiter on Seginus, making this one of the specific markers of his administration.  Seginus suggests being brought down by bad associates, like with the Trump Administration where it’s a rotten barrel in a swamp.   This is especially so when conjunct Juno and on the Midheaven.  Imagine being the wife of Harvey Weinstein or Louis CK.  Avoid that, because such a person won’t lose a minute of sleep over how they’ve ruined you, no matter what they say.  Imagine that scenario as if it were really happening, and ask yourself, “Do I deserve that?  Who should I owe such loyalty to, and why?”

It will be very important for you to work with your Neptune, keep your discernment sharp by practicing ethical impeccability.  You are likely to lie to yourself, with your chart ruling maniac Saturn square Neptune.  The thing to remember is that Neptune is the part of you that directly reflects God.  The more you embrace and enhance Neptune, the more divinity you express with every beat of your heart.  The more Saturn you embrace, the less your heart can shine.  It is very difficult to be both warm and cold at the same time, though I guess there is fried ice cream.


Of course all that Saturn can be an amazing gift for someone with as much internal flexibility as you have.  You don’t usually see so much movement in such a heavy Saturn chart, because Saturn is an Earth planet, all about rigidity and stability, imposing order.  On this theme, there is a musical selection below that expresses your theme beautifully in the lyrics, even if the music is not your cup of wasabi.  (If you’re not familiar with this band, you might turn the speakers down.  If you are familiar, you’re welcome.)

Something else specifically on career.  There are a number of things that make me suspect you are likely to have social difficulties.   Saturn is not so feminine, which is unfortunately still a social consideration even in 2017.  You have Capricorn on the Ascendant, which can make you come across very serious and a long-term thinker.  People may experience you as a bit of a sourpuss, or wish you were more feminine, the old “you should smile.”  Saturn is not a smiler.

angela discipline

Also you have the Sun closely conjunct Toro the Raging Bull, as I said above.  You may come on strong for people in a way that women aren’t expected to.   Also you have both Capricorn and Uranus in the 1st house, which will automatically throw some people energetically, even without the presence of Neptune and Uranus.  The 1st house is akin to your psychic face, the thing that is front and center, what everybody sees of you as a first impression.

Neptune can be personified by the guru.  Some people think he has an amazing conduit to the divine.  Others find him to be a snake-oil salesman.  Especially the strong Saturn people.  They often have a very hard time feeling their Neptune, because the two have a sort of opposite focus.  Neptune blurs the edges and lines, while Saturn breaks things down to pinpoints and sorts them both chronologically and alphabetically, with the OCD.   Throw Neptune into the 1st house, automatically freak a lot of people out.

Uranus is the thrower of curveballs, the wild card, like Roger Stone.  So there is some strong sense of you appearing to be an iconoclast, one who is maybe detached and hard to get to know, a little out in left field like Dr. Hackett.  This is not the real you, not with that Moon in Cancer with her yod and mini-kite.  That is a deeply heartfelt, loving person with a strong feminine intuition.  But you may appear quite direct due to the Toro.  Saturn makes people prickly on a good day.

angela titillated

Please know that some people will key into your potential, and think they can harness it even if they don’t understand it.  There are always those so greedy they believe they can ride the lightning.  Your 12th house Dejanira is considered to be in the 1st house.  So you may carry a certain victim vibe that you are unaware of, especially with your Saturn square Neptune.  That can be very self-defeating, like having the valve to your higher self tending to rust shut.  But you have strong positives here.  You have given yourself ways to find your own truth and work from it.  The yods are all servants of Neptune, in a way.  The yods will keep you aware of the fact that at the end of the day, your higher self is the boss of your life, not your Saturn self.  The sands will move under your feet, the carpet will suddenly fly away.  I’m sure Saturn wants to fight that and has every intention of winning.  But know that feeling good, feeling happy and connected, feeling your own true worth, that is the only point.  You can map everything out to the nth degree, and at the end of the day that might give satisfaction, but never joy.

So it’s important that you understand you have to pave your own way.  When I asked what you were passionate about, you went on and on about astrology.  Well that is your answer.  Computer science can be very well applied to astrology.  Astrology needs Saturn people.  I’ll be honest, I didn’t like the career suggestion of you using that Saturn/Venus combination to go into beauty and makeup.  That came from a man.  Personally, I wish Saturn would really turn away from Venus, stop picking at her about every little perceived flaw.  Astrology, on the other hand, has a megaton of mathematical data to be considered, a mountain of reading to be done.  We need people to comb through old documents as cuneiform tablets are discovered, and consider what else needs to be incorporated into our canon of knowledge.  Clearly computers are integral to all of that.  Look at the extravagant selection of variables available at  There really are an unlimited number of ways you can put Saturn to good use.

It’s possible to create a career that excites you while paying your bills.  The more you can be true to yourself, exploring your Neptune in ways that make you feel loved and accepted from within, the better career opportunities will open up.  Your Achilles’ heel, as I see it, is self-sabotage.  If you allow low self-esteem to be a factor in every decision you make about yourself and your life, as Saturn clearly wants it to be, you open yourself up to relationships with people who would exploit and abuse you.  You must now allow that negative, sour voice to carry the day when you look in the mirror.  You must know that your gifts are important, and only you can really feel them.  Then make your Saturn work for it, instead of you being a slave to Saturn and the insecurities it breeds/feeds on.  There are good jobs for Saturn, just like a German Shepherd, a personal trainer, or an accountant.  I suggest you make him work for the Moon and Venus, and you will surely find happiness.  But never let your dog or your accountant run your life.  They are all there to serve you, not the other way around, whether human or otherwise.  It’s your life.

I haven’t really discussed your locomotive chart yet.  But your empty spot is centered more or less around your active Midheaven.  Then your Saturn is over there in the 4th.   Your locomotive engine is Pluto, in that nice yod with the Moon and Saturn, like a family counseling mediator.   Pluto can get to the bottom of things.  If you think about planets doing rock, paper scissors, Saturn might be the scissors that cuts you short.  But Pluto is the rock that can smash it, just like he ripped a hole in the Earth to abduct Persephone.  Pluto flips over the apple cart and makes you start over, then Saturn has to pick it all back up and put it back right.

So I suspect that life will keep you on your toes.  I suggest you find ways to incorporate all of the things that excite you.  Your career itself can be an art form in which you express different parts of yourself as you discover them and learn to incorporate them.  Your astrology guides are obviously working overtime, because I’ve never even checked that thread at all before and they tapped me on the shoulder and sent me to look.  I pulled your question because you got the least answers, that simple.  There’s nothing simple about such things, dear.  That’s synchronicity, a sign that you are moving in the direction of better integration and alignment.

So with the Midheaven right in the empty spot of your locomotive, and your non-traditional sort of femininity, I can only imagine you would prefer to have something woman-centric and pleasant, if not fun with all that Saturn.  But if you can practice raising your fun-tolerance threshold I think that will help.  I suspect you might be quite introspective, and as I said with the 1st house, maybe not easily read by less clever or evolved people.

Ultimately I feel you can do amazing things with astrology.  You might consider getting a number of smaller degrees, like one in electronics, one in math, one in computer science, and creating a large toolkit while you are young.  Astrology can be incorporated into art.  you can create software tools that help astrologers.  I don’t know if you can imagine how much your Saturn would benefit a goofy Neptune lady like me who can’t keep her chronology straight on anything anymore.  The longer you go through life adding skills and training, the more ideas you will have about what you truly enjoy, what kind of people get you, and where you can make the best impact.  Because your Uranus and Pluto are both wanting to be a force for positive things, I think.  They are less-prominent because of the intense stuff.  But like with certain orange presidents, you don’t have to let the loudest, most obnoxious guy talk all the time just because he wants to.

Jane, I am excited to see what you will choose for yourself.  If you have any questions or comments please let me know.  And I mean that going forward as well.  I am glad to support you.


Chris Christie, Astrosplained

While we’re busy Febreezing New Jersey, this is a good opportunity to Astrosplain what the hell’s been going on over there, at least in the mansion.  Mansions.  He was working at the one on the closed beach in the picture, okay?  Mind your business!  Run for governor and you can have the house too.  Don’t make me close the road you live on.

I have to turn off my channeling while I look at this guy.  Because frankly I have some serious Moon/Saturn issues myself, and a big fat Mars T-square from hell too, and I can swear way more than he can and would love to prove it to him.    Let me ‘splain what I’m talking about here, the moody ass Moon of Chris Christie — not the beach ball one you can see with your eyes, but the one you can hear in all the crap he says in this video.  Wouldn’t it be kind of fun to just say, “Are you stupid?” anytime you thought it?

So yes, while the people of New Jersey celebrate the reopening of their beaches and turnpike exits, I have lit a candle for this whole crew to go to jail and stay there forever.  He may have been smart enough to avoid doing anything that Mueller will eat him alive for, maybe.  But judging by Bridgegate, and Kim Guadagno’s subsequent run for governor, maybe not.  They all seem to think consequences can’t possibly mean them.  I’d like to know if they’re all wrong, including this guy.  And thus gentle reader I have Astrosplained the soon to be forgotten Chris Christie.  Ding, dong, the mitch is dead.

chris christie chart.png

This is a very busy, eye-poking chart. But the first place to look is the Sun, the prime directive of the soul seeking incarnation.  Here I do have a proper birth time, thanks again to the valedictorians at    Houses and angles add a wealth of information, and this chart, like Harvey’s, is a great example of prominent angles.  This is a locomotive chart with a Mars engine, overall ruled by Saturn.

This is an extraordinarily complicated Sun, with a blinding number of aspects in both red and blue.  This is a lot of ego conflict, a lot of engagement with other people as shown in the video above.  The Sun is in Virgo, so Saturn is the ruler of this chart.  However Pluto is combust, or consumed within the Sun’s corona.  While Uranus is out of orb for the Sun, it is in orb for Pluto.  I realize this is controversial, but for now I am a believer in fudging my orbs.  I have seen that everything is connected, and people can pull their energies in a lot of directions, even if the connections are not so automatic to the naked eye or strictly mathematical.  Scientists have only known how bees can fly for about ten years, you know.

At any rate I am considering conjunctions to be literally merged into one, like plastic beads that melt together into whatever shape, sort of like psychic gerrymandering.  People come up with all kinds of ways to extend their energies here and there, connecting dots that other people would never imagine.   It’s one of the luxuries of the way I work, that is to say cherry picking information from charts of public figures.  For example Christie has Regulus a smidgin out of orb for the Midheaven.  But I would have to say he looks to me like one who definitely fancies himself king, which is further borne out by the Jupiter IC, which I am getting to.  And like with any of the Royal Stars, if your integrity falters in any way, the native fails spectacularly.  This is a deeply hated politician, who allowed Trump to use and abuse him and got rolled for his efforts.

For my money, Christie has the Sun conjunct both Pluto and Uranus on the Midheaven, in the Gauquelin sector even.  The Gauquelin sectors are the range within 5 degrees on either side of the four major angles, 10 degrees total.  A planet on the Midheaven is said to denote fame, because of the 10th house’s role in describing the career and public life.  So yes, Chris Christie is very famous for being an egotistical bully with unique ideas and a disconnect from the rest of humanity.  He does have a certain ingenuity, and the drive of a locomotive, or he wouldn’t be where he is.  But let me not dwell on Uranus, which is a minor player, subservient to Saturn as I will explain below.

Importantly, the only angle that Christie doesn’t have a major contact is his Ascendant.  He has the famous Blinking Demon, Algol, on the Descendant, opposition his AC.  I think it makes him capable of just about anything when it comes to other people and how he relates to them.   He has Neptune conjunct Toro in Scorpio in the 12th house.   Christie’s Neptune is complicated; even though it’s in the grand trine and kite, it’s in the 12th house, conjunct an out-of-control asteroid, and square the chart ruler, Saturn.  If the Ascendant is like the face, the 12th house is the back of the head, something we cannot possibly see without some help, like a mirror.  12th house things, it’s easy to forget they exist.  Other people can see them clearly, though.  Christie’s Neptune is thus IMO afflicted, especially conjunct Toro.

Also importantly, Scorpio is of the nature of Mars and Pluto.  Toro is the red flag waving at the bull, the thing that will make him lose it and charge.  The video above is full of such instances, where Christie is completely out of line with his constituents as though they were drunks harassing his children at a grocery store.  Scorpio is both mean and secretive.  Mars is the definitive aggression planet, especially when you have an Antares contact.  Evolved Mars is about clarity, courage, and leadership.  I have not seen that in him, though others obviously did enough at some point to elect him to office.  Again, Mars and Pluto are both raging in this chart.

The 12th house Toro Neptune got me to look at the specifics of his verbal sucker punches.  Neptune is about smoke and mirrors, when it’s at all afflicted.  It’s about poor integrity — which, again, in a chart with any Royal Star or Algol contact at all spells disaster.  The pattern I see in the above video is that when someone has Christie dead to rights, his Neptune basically changes the conversation to an alternative-facts one that enrages him, and then Toro charges.  He has his own red flag, basically, is his own bull, and will defend his own bullshit to the death.  It’s on the back of his head where we can all see it, and he doesn’t think it’s a thing.  Buh-bye, Chris.

Like General Kelly and General McMaster, this is a guy who can’t afford to fib, even to himself, ever.  The 12th house makes you vulnerable to secret enemies.  I can only hope and pray he somehow stepped in something that leads Mueller et al. to him.   He is quite likely to have kicked enough underlings in the face that it could come back to haunt him.  I am confident they will get straight up his birthday cakes if he did.  Christie is oblivious to how obvious his poor integrity is, thanks to the 12th house Neptune.

Christie’s Moon is smack dab on Antares.   Antares-Aldebaran are in permanent opposition, on what I think of as the leadership-immaturity axis.  Any contact with either Aldebaran or Antares automatically puts the enemy at your back.  Antares adds to other chart factors (Pluto, Mars, Uranus) making him volatile.  Pluto is also immature, mean, vindictive, and prone to lashing out on his whims.  For me any Antares connection, especially as prominent as this one, tanks the whole chart.  (Also obviously an Aldebaran contact in an afflicted-Neptune chart; integrity issues send you straight to Antares.)

Add to that his raging Jupiter, where he truly feels better than everyone else, plus Algol, Regulus, Fomalhaut, and other issues, and this guy is a pre-Hindenburg walking around playing with matches.  There is nothing in this chart that speaks to humility, gratitude, or any kind of grace or centering, much less integrity.  He may look like a beer keg in a suit, but that’s actually a powderkeg full of nails underneath.  In a weird way he’s totally honest, by being a complete dick whenever it suits him, in your face.   He has greatly empowered the Moon by putting her at the head of a mini-kite.  But she’s at the head of a T-square, that lifelong psychic pebble in the shoe.   And again, he’s a giant pipe bomb of entitlement, emotionally.  That’s his deal.  His ideology is his own entitlement, full stop.

Worse yet, the other members of the T-square, the ones in such fierce opposition punching each other’s faces with the Moon standing between them, are his Jupiter/Fomalhaut IC and his Sun/Pluto MC.   So his moods, the way it actually feels to be him most of the time, is the old torn between two lovers, feelin’ like a fool.  Christie’s Moon is in the first house, which is why there is a highlights reel of him showing his butt on camera.  Even on election day, he doesn’t care enough about his protégé to bother being nice to constituents with cameras.  He doesn’t have a drop of anything in him that allows for that restraint.

Christie’s Moon is in Sagittarius, making her a tool of Jupiter.  Again, Jupiter represents the government, and Trump specificially with his strong Jupiter.  Trump himself is denoted by a contact with Seginus the Guard, which he has conjunct Jupiter.  But Christie has no Seginus or Algorab the Crow contact.  This may be partly why there would be absolutely no cabinet post for him.  Chris has a Jupiter/Regulus/born better than y’all issue.  And he’s moody AF.

For my own purposes of this series, Christie does not have any Mintaka, Seginus, or Algorab contacts.  He is a highly oppositional, highly conflict-driven motherfucker, which is obvious from the highlights reel.  His attitude is purely the raging entitlement to special treatment that screams out from his MC/IC axis.  Jupiter is there right on the IC, in Christie’s deepest heart of hearts, how he feels about himself.  And there’s Jupiter, conjunct Chiron on the other side like a smaller plastic bead melted to a giant one, with the IC and Fomalhaut fused to Jupiter’s other side.  Christie has an extreme belief in himself as an emperor among not kings, but peasants.

Another factor that always reminds me of the IC is Vesta the True Believer.  Vesta is sort of the sorest spot in your heart of hearts, something you would kill or die for, no questions asked.  I note that Christie often pivots to defense of his wife and children when he goes into self-enraging bull mode.   With all due respect, fuck both his mother and his wife.  I chose a picture with her in it for a reason.  Christie has Juno the Spouse conjunct his Vesta, which is all about his entitlement to be king.  Mrs. Christie is actually worse than Carmela Soprano to me, because society has always validated her as respectable while she stands on our throats.  Other than that I love her, totally.  His mom?   Well, he has Ceres on the North Node, right there in Leo, like a literal in-law apartment from his Marie Antoinette wife.  His mother made him exactly who he is.

Christie has a turbocharged Mars, in the grand trine and kite.  Fiery Mars is in the Moon’s sign of Cancer, which is like dipping a match in water.   But don’t worry, Chris has plenty of other things to make him highly aggro, discussed above.  Because Mars is in the prominent Moon’s sign, while the Moon is conjunct Mars’ worst enemy, Antares (anti-Aries), basically all his aggression defers to his own emotional agenda in the Moon.  What this guy does passes for leadership only because our society is deeply screwed.

Last thing to mention here on Christie’s Minute 16, 3rd house Saturn in Aquarius, a sign Saturn co-rules with Uranus.  Saturn is where the rubber meets the road, the one who lays down the law and tells you how it’s going to go.  Aquarius is prominent here because of Uranus’ place on the MC and Saturn’s location. Aquarius imparts a detachment to the rest of humanity, the Major Tom archetype.   Saturn, the chart ruler, is in the mini-kite with the Moon.  Saturn is the psychic skeleton, the physical infrastructure in which the personality can express itself.  Saturn always reads the fine print, even though he writes it.  He just does, that’s his thing.  He likes to nip problems in the bud, even when they’re not necessarily his problem.  That’s the thing about Saturn, he’s bossy AF and super annoying, like Sam Clovis.  Ultimately this Saturn/Uranus dynamic is what makes Christie so very comfortable ruling by fiat from on high.

Don’t let the door hit you in them birthday cakes, Chris.